Well, as of tomorrow it will officially be baby month! I'm currently 37 weeks along and at this point I feel so prepared, but also so unprepared.
This pregnancy has been literally the complete opposite from my first. Most likely due to the fact that this baby is a boy. But also because I've kind of brushed this pregnancy aside a bit--which I totally regret now.
I'm not sure why, but I went into this pregnancy wanting to just keep everything to ourselves. With Finley we told everyone really early on, and this time around I wanted to hold on to the secret for as long as possible. We didn't tell our parents until 9 weeks and our siblings until 12 weeks. I didn't want to post about it on social media until I knew the gender. And now I've barely posted about this baby at all and I really don't know why. Maybe it's because I'm so much busier running around taking care of a toddler now or maybe this is just how second pregnancies are.
And with it being my second pregnancy, I just haven't put as much thought into bringing a new baby into our home as I did with Finley. I remember being so nervous the first time around, feeling like I had no idea what I was doing. And I guess I just feel like we've done fine with our first kid, so I'm sure everything will be fine with our second.
Don't get me wrong, I am so so excited about this little boy. And the fact that he is a boy does make me a little bit nervous still. I wonder about how different it will be taking care of a little boy and if I'll have enough energy to keep up with him when he starts running around. And I'm totally freaked out about circumcision haha!
But I don't know.. I guess I just went into this pregnancy with the mindset of wanting to not make that big of a deal of it. And I should have. Because it is a big deal. It's a huge deal.
So I'm sorry baby boy. For not giving you the attention you deserved throughout this pregnancy. I'm sorry for not taking enough pictures and for not keeping a consistent record of all my pregnancy symptoms and cravings.
But I guess in the end, none of that stuff really matters. You most likely will never care about any of it. What matters is my relationship with you going forward. And that you know and never doubt how much I love you. I know you were meant to join our family at this time. And I'm so excited for all the snuggles and the kisses and to watch your journey throughout this life unfold.
Just a few more weeks until you're here. And I think I'm more ready for you than I thought.
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